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旅美资讯

Stupid Questions with the smart answers...
浏览次数:3026     添加时间:2006/10/26


>
>BOY : May I hold your hand? **
>GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy.
>**
>**GIRL :** Say you love me! Say you love me! **
>BOY : You love me... **
>
>
>**GIRL :** If we become engaged will you give me a ring?? **
>BOY : Sure, what's your phone number?? **
>
>
>**GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest. **
>BOY : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple **
>
>
>GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever.
>BOY : Don't you ever want to improve??
>
>
>**BOY :** I love you and I could die for you! **
>GIRL : How soon??
>**
>**BOY : **I would go to the end of the world for you! **
>GIRL : Yes, but would you stay there??
>**
>**SHARON** : **Have you ever had a hot passionate, burning kiss?? **
>**TRACY **: I did once. He'd forgotten to take the cigarette out of
>his
>mouth. **
>**
>**MAN : **You remind me of the sea. **
>WOMAN : Because I'm wild, romantic and exciting?
>MAN : NO, because you make me sick. **
>
>
>**WIFE :** You tell a man something, it goes in one ear and comes out
>of the
>other. **
>HUSBAND : You tell a woman something: It goes in both ears and comes
>out of
>the mouth. **
>
>
>MARY : John says I'm pretty. Andy says I'm ugly.What do u think,
>Peter?
>PETER : A bit of both. I think you're pretty ugly.
>
>
>**1) Girlfriend : "...And are you sure you love me and no one else ?"
>**
>Boyfriend : "Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday". **
>
>
>**2) Teacher : "Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon?"
>**
>Pupil : "The moon".
>Teacher : "Why?"
>Pupil : "The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun
>gives
>us light only in the day time when we don't need it". **
>
>
>3) Teacher : "What do you call a person who keeps on talking when
>people are
>no longer interested?"
>Pupil : "A teacher".
>
>
>**4) Waiter : "Would you like your coffee black?" **
>Customer : "What other colors do you have?" **
>
>
>**5) My father is so old that when he was in school, history was
>called
>current affairs. **
>**
>**6) Teacher : "Sam, you talk a lot !" **
>Sam : "It's a family tradition".
>Teacher : "What do you mean?"
>Sam : "Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher".
>Teacher : "What about your mother?"
>Sam : "She's a woman". **
>
>
>**7) Tom : "How should I convey the news to my father that I've
>failed?" **
>David: "You just send a telegram: Result declared, past year's
>performance
>repeated". **
>
>
>**8) Teacher : "Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and
>stopped
>him, what virtue would I be showing?" **
>Student : "Brotherly love".
>**
>**9) Teacher : "Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before
>eating?"
>**
>Sam : "No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook". **
>
>
>**10) Patient : "What are the chances of my recovering doctor?" **
>Doctor : "One hundred percent. Medical records show that nine out of
>ten
>people die of the disease you have. Yours is the tenth case I've
>treated.
>The others all died".
>**
>**11) Teacher : " Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?" **
>One Student : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day
>and at
>the same time."
>**
>12) Teacher : " George Washington not only chopped down his father's
>Cherry
>tree, but also admitted doing it.
>Now do you know why his father didn't punish him ?"
>One Student: " Because George still had the axe in is hand." *

 

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